Merlin Mann’s Wisdom Project is an excellent collection of pithy and useful observations about the world. They range from the purely practical, to the advisory, to the somewhat absurd. It’s worth a read.
I follow a Mastodon Bot that posts something from the document every six hours, and save any that catch my eye. This one resonated with me:
Try to save some parts of your life to be just for you. Including some special things that you’re happy about or are even a little proud of. If your only private things are shameful things, you will become very sad and will eventually despise your own company.
Merlin Mann
This message is increasingly acute in a world where it’s easy to externalize experiences, activities, and values. We’re encouraged to create horcruxes across social media which changes our self-perception and ability to fully understand who we are beyond what we share. This is accelerated among those whose livelihood requires them to be online, particularly if their mainly compromises their daily lives.
But the situation doesn’t need to be nearly this extreme to be impactful. If we define our worth in this world solely by factors that others nominally control, we have no sway over how we view ourselves. While we can hope to surround ourselves by well-meaning friends and lovely individuals, it’s still unhealthy to lose that sense of self by spreading it around. We each need ways to focus on ourselves and gain a better understanding of who we are independent of those around us. We can often define much of our lives by how we relate to others, but the way those relationships pan out are a product of who we intrinsically are.